From a Buddhist perspective, what happens after falling in love and getting married is a transition from the intoxication of romance to a structured, domestic life that provides a, "supportive, affectionate, and stable environment" for spiritual practice, rather than just sensual indulgence. The focus shifts toward commitment, mutual care, and the management of desires to avoid suffering (dukkha).
Here is a breakdown of the perspective on marriage and sexual organs (sexuality) in Buddhism:
1. Marriage as a "Container" for Practice
No Sacred Sacrament: Marriage is generally seen as a secular, social contract, not a religious sacrament.
Purpose: The goal is to "nurture" each other, reduce loneliness, provide companionship, and create a stable base for a family.
Mindful Relationship: Instead of being "animals" driven purely by lust, partners are encouraged to develop deep, kind, and loving companionship that survives the inevitable fading of youthful beauty.
The Reality of Impermanence: Buddhists are reminded that their partner is impermanent, empty, and will change. Clinging to the early, idealized phase of love causes suffering.
2. Sexual Organs and Sexual Energy
Neutral Energy: Sexual energy is not considered "sinful" or "evil." It is viewed as natural, biological, and "neutral" energy.
The Problem is Craving: The danger lies not in the sexual organs themselves, but in the desire, craving, and attachment to pleasure that they generate (a "hindrance" to spiritual development).
Beyond Physicality: Sexual activity should be an expression of a "deeply satisfying emotional relationship" where both partners give and take equally.
3. Sexual Conduct Post-Marriage
Ethical Guidelines: The key is to avoid sexual misconduct (Third Precept), which means engaging in sex without causing harm, exploitation, or dishonesty.
Fidelity and Respect: A happy, married life involves mutual respect, where the husband and wife are faithful to each other.
Moderation: Overindulgence is discouraged, as it can lead to craving and attachment, which are root causes of suffering.
A "Middle Way" in Sex: While some Buddhist traditions are conservative or favor reproductive sex, others see sex in a committed relationship as a natural, pleasurable experience that should be handled with mindfulness rather than repressed.
4. What Happens to the Body?
Acknowledging Decay: Buddhism encourages contemplating the physical body's nature (including sexual organs) as impermanent—subject to sickness, aging, and eventual decay. This reduces attachment and helps maintain perspective when sexual desire diminishes over time.
Transitioning from Lust: The goal is to move from "animal love" (based on physical attractiveness) to a deeper, more mature love, allowing both partners to focus on spiritual growth as they age.
In summary, Buddhism encourages taking the energy of love and marriage and directing it toward mutual respect, kindness, and mindfulness, rather than allowing it to be consumed by uncontrolled desire.
